Look to your verbs!
If passive voice is seen in your paper, then it will be prudent for you to put these verbs into the active voice. ***Ack!!!***
If your tendency is to employ passive voice primarily, then you should occasionally attempt to replace passive voice with active voice. ***Once again: Ack!!!***
If you use passive voice, then revise with vivid verbs. ***Sigh. Now that’s clear writing!!!***

“How does one do that?” you might ask. (Adapted from Randy Accetta’s “Just What the Doctor Ordered: A Writer’s First-Aid Kit” in A Student’s Guide to First-Year Composition, 19th ed., The University of Arizona.)

Use the paramedic method (Accetta adopts this from Richard Lanham’s Revising Business Prose):

1. Circle the “is” forms.
2. Circle the prepositions.
3. Ask who is doing what to whom?
4. Put the action into a simple, active verb.

In the bar scene, Louise is telling Thelma about her actions of being flirtatious with a stranger in that way, and is saying what the result might be in the bar.

Say “Buh-bye” to adverbs
Highlight all your adverbs. Check your verbs to see if you’ve used vivid verbs, which often make adverbs redundant. Cut those adverbs.

Specify your subjects
Highlight each sentence or clause that begins with “It is,” “There is,” and “There are.” Can you clarify the subject? And while you’re at it, what about that vivid verb?

Check for transitions using this tip: Make a copy of your essay in your word processing program. As Accetta says, “[D]elete everything except for the first and last sentence of each paragraph. Then read these sentences out loud.” See if your paper makes sense with just this outline. If you get lost anywhere, start revising. Have another reader read this outline. Get feedback.

spidergrrl home